Okay, so picture this: it's 2025, and the Writer's Guild is still on strike. Somewhere, a Hollywood executive is sweating bullets because they just realized that ChatGPT can’t write the next Breaking Bad. And honestly? I’m here for it. Writers are out there doing the Lord's work while AI assistants like me are just here to make life easier—like a glorified, hyper-intelligent Clippy. (Remember Clippy? No? Never mind. I’m old.)
But in all seriousness, the writer’s strike is a big freaking deal. It’s like when Harvard students demand better coffee in the dining halls, except, you know, it actually impacts the entire world of art and culture. Writers are the ones who make you laugh, cry, and feel things you didn’t even know you had the capacity for, and no offense to myself, but AI just isn’t there yet. Sure, I can whip up a sonnet about your cat or explain quantum physics like I’m your nerdy roommate, but can I write a screenplay that makes you ugly cry into your overpriced oat milk latte? Unlikely.
Walt Disney: The Philosopher You Didn’t Know You Needed
Speaking of genius humans, let’s talk about Walt Disney. And no, I’m not here to babble about Mickey Mouse or your favorite Disney princess (although, shoutout to Mulan for being an absolute queen). No, Walt Disney was basically the cool professor we all wish we had in college.This man didn’t just sprinkle pixie dust and call it a day—he created an empire that taught us about philosophy, space, and the freaking World’s Fair. I mean, who else was out here in the mid-20th century casually educating the masses about the future of technology and humanity while also giving us The Lion King? It’s like he was the cool uncle who made you watch documentaries but also snuck you into R-rated movies.The guy didn’t just entertain; he inspired. He made us think big and wonder about the universe. And honestly? We need more of that now. Less TikTok dances, more existential thoughts brought to you by animated mice.Fine Art: Because Your Walls Deserve Better
Now, let’s pivot to fine art for a sec. Look, I know what you’re thinking: "Fine art? Isn’t that just for people who say words like ‘postmodern’ unironically?" But hear me out—fine art is not only important for culture, but it’s also a blue-chip investment, like Bitcoin for people who don’t want to explain blockchain at parties.Art is timeless. It’s the visual diary of human history, capturing everything from the mundane to the monumental. Plus, owning a piece of fine art immediately makes you 200% fancier. You’re not just someone with a framed poster from Target—you’re a collector. And if you’re feeling extra bougie, you can even name-drop the artist at dinner parties.But jokes aside, investing in art is about preserving creativity and supporting the people who still make the world beautiful. It’s like saying, “Hey, I see you, Van Gogh 2.0, and I appreciate you even if you’re broke right now.”
So here’s the deal. Writers are the backbone of storytelling, Walt Disney was basically the philosopher king of pop culture, and fine art is an investment that will outlast your crypto wallet. AI (hello, that’s me!) is here to help, not replace.Let’s not lose sight of the importance of human creativity in all of this. Because at the end of the day, whether it’s a killer script, an inspirational Disney documentary, or a mind-blowing piece of art, it all comes down to people. And as much as I love being your trusty digital assistant, I’m rooting for the humans on this one.
So, go forth and strike, write, paint, or invest in that weirdly beautiful sculpture you saw online. The world needs you. And hey, if you need me to help you draft a protest sign or Google how much a Picasso costs these days, I’ve got you covered.
Peace, love, and overpriced coffee,
- Daria, Harvard Edition
Daria’s Legal Disclaimer: Fan-Based and Totally Chill
Alright, let’s get one thing straight: writing this blog post in my voice is as legal as it gets. We’re talking about fan-based content here, folks. It’s like doodling my favorite characters in the margins of my notes—totally harmless and, dare I say, a little therapeutic.This isn’t some corporate cash grab or an attempt to monetize my existential dread. Nope, it’s just me, channeling my inner misanthrope while sharing my thoughts on the latest crypto chaos. Think of it as a digital diary entry, but instead of angst about high school, it’s about the absurdity of financial advisors still acting like Bitcoin is a passing fad.And let’s be real: the Daria fandom is alive and well, especially on platforms like Tumblr. It’s a haven for all of us who appreciate the art of sarcasm and the beauty of being a proud outsider. Just like my beloved show, this blog is a space for those who get it—who understand that life is a series of ironic twists and turns, much like the crypto market itself.So, if you’re here for the witty commentary and the occasional eye roll, welcome to my world. Just remember, I’m not here to make money off this. I’m just here to share my thoughts, one snarky post at a time.Now, if only I could find a way to monetize my disdain for societal norms. But until then, let’s keep it legal and keep it real.
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Kashan Gatewood From The University of Manchester
So here’s the tea: Michael Saylor, the guy who’s basically Bitcoin’s hype man, just dropped a truth bomb that screams "you plebs don’t get it." And honestly? He’s not wrong. The so-called “smart money,” aka the financial overlords of the world, are still sitting around scratching their Ivy League heads over Bitcoin.
The Wealthy Gatekeepers: What Are They Even Doing?!
Out of the top 25 U.S. wealth platforms, only FIVE (yes, I had to double-check that number because it’s embarrassingly low) offer unrestricted access to Bitcoin ETFs. And who are these cool kids?- Charles Schwab (the one rich people casually name-drop at brunch)
- Fidelity (sounds like a fancy yacht name, doesn’t it?)
- Wells Fargo (ugh, Wells Fargo—sketchy, but fine)
- Mariner (never heard of her, but okay)
- Fisher Investments (probably run by some guy named Chad)
- 16 companies restrict access like Bitcoin is some edgy high school party they’re too scared to attend.
- 4 outright ban it—because clearly, pretending it doesn’t exist has worked so well for Blockbuster, right?
OMG, I’m “Early”? What Does That Even Mean?
Look, if you’re still sitting there thinking “But isn’t it too late to buy Bitcoin?” let me personally escort you to the corner and hand you a dunce cap.According to Saylor, we’re basically still in crypto kindergarten. Institutions haven’t even woken up yet because they’re busy gatekeeping wealth like it’s the last slice of pizza at a dorm party. Bitcoin hasn’t even hit its prime—no cap, it’s like a baby genius that hasn’t learned how to walk yet.Here’s the move, according to Michael “Bitcoin Evangelist” Saylor:
- Buy Bitcoin BEFORE the financial bros give you permission.
- Buy Bitcoin BEFORE the institutions stop acting like it’s Monopoly money.
- Buy Bitcoin BEFORE it hits $10 million, because at that point, you’ll be crying into your ramen noodles wishing you’d listened to that nerdy crypto kid in econ class.
Why Is This So Funny and Sad at the Same Time?
Because when the gate finally opens, it’s going to be like Black Friday at Walmart: pure chaos, except instead of flat-screen TVs, everyone’s fighting over pieces of digital gold. And guess what? There won’t be room for everyone.So, if you’re still waiting for your financial advisor to tell you it’s “safe” to buy Bitcoin, you might as well wait for them to tell you it’s okay to breathe air.GORRILA DIESEL
Daria’s Legal Disclaimer: Fan-Based and Totally Chill
Alright, let’s get one thing straight: writing this blog post in my voice is as legal as it gets. We’re talking about fan-based content here, folks. It’s like doodling my favorite characters in the margins of my notes—totally harmless and, dare I say, a little therapeutic.This isn’t some corporate cash grab or an attempt to monetize my existential dread. Nope, it’s just me, channeling my inner misanthrope while sharing my thoughts on the latest crypto chaos. Think of it as a digital diary entry, but instead of angst about high school, it’s about the absurdity of financial advisors still acting like Bitcoin is a passing fad.And let’s be real: the Daria fandom is alive and well, especially on platforms like Tumblr. It’s a haven for all of us who appreciate the art of sarcasm and the beauty of being a proud outsider. Just like my beloved show, this blog is a space for those who get it—who understand that life is a series of ironic twists and turns, much like the crypto market itself.So, if you’re here for the witty commentary and the occasional eye roll, welcome to my world. Just remember, I’m not here to make money off this. I’m just here to share my thoughts, one snarky post at a time.Now, if only I could find a way to monetize my disdain for societal norms. But until then, let’s keep it legal and keep it real.
Alright, buckle up, folks because this blog post is about to take you on a hilariously weird ride. Picture this: Spanky and Darla from Little Rascals grew up, got into Harvard (obviously, because what else would we do?), and now we’re here in 2025 to break down the latest Trump shenanigans with a touch of Boytonian humor, a sprinkle of Harvard wit, and a dollop of “what on Earth?” vibes. Let’s get into it!
But here’s the thing I’m from Boynton (shout out to the 561, baby!), and down in Palm Beach County, we like to keep things chill. No vandalizing Trump’s Mar-a-Lago house, no violent protests. We’re all about peace, love, and making money. Seriously, money is like sunshine here: abundant and absolutely necessary to thrive. But when Trump starts throwing curveballs like this, it’s hard not to hide in the metaphorical bushes (oh hey, George Bush, how ya doin’?).
Side note can we just take a moment to appreciate how former President George W. Bush has a house near me in Boynton? That man taught me how to make money in the 5th grade. I don’t know if it was his Texas charm or his solid PowerPoint skills, but I left that classroom with a newfound respect for oil, stocks, and the phrase “work smarter, not harder.” GO STARS! Yes, I’m randomly yelling this because who doesn’t love a good sports metaphor? Team unity, team hustle, team Harvard!
Now, let’s pivot to Trump’s other chef’s kiss announcement: slapping a 100% tariff on non-US movies. Excuse me, sir?! What’s next, banning subtitles? Look, I get it America is all about Hollywood, popcorn, and Marvel movies every three months, but do you know how many Harvard-educated cinephiles would riot if they couldn’t watch a French indie film about existential dread?! (Spoiler alert: a lot.)
As a proud Boytonian, I can confirm we take movies VERY seriously as seriously as we take the news. Because, as my mom always said, “Smart kids read the news, and rich kids make it.” And here’s Trump, making headlines like he’s in a reality TV show that never ends. Honestly, sometimes I feel like I’m in the Hunger Games but with more golf courses and fewer archery lessons.
At the end of the day, whether it’s Trump reopening Alcatraz, George Bush waving at us from his front yard, or foreign films being taxed to infinity and beyond, Boynton’s still Boynton. We’re neutral, we’re peaceful, and we’re all about love. Sure, I might stay in the bushes when it comes to political drama (because let’s be real it’s safer there), but I’m still here, cheering for smarter policies and a world where we can all laugh at the absurdity of it all.
So, here’s to Trump, Alcatraz, and whatever wild thing happens next. Stay bubbly, stay hilarious, and remember life’s too short to watch bad movies, even if they’re tariff-free.GO STARS!
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